Whilst shopping for some oh-so-tasty kiwis at a fancy Publix, I was started to hear sounds of thunder and flashing lights. First off, I don't recall ever having doing any type of hallucinogenic drugs, so it was real. So, lo and behold, this fake storm was the result of some genius at Publix who felt that by doing so, the consumer would be tempted to buy more produce. I asked the stocker why they did that, and he gave me the "what the fuck do I know, I'm getting paid to make sure the green and red peppers don't mix." Now, I don't have a marketing degree, but does thunderstorms = vegetables? And is the cost of these special effects driving up the price of the zucchini? I'll be damned if my veggies cost more b/c it has to cover some Bose speakers and a strobe light. Then, as I walked by the dairy section, it mooed at me. I'm glad that it mooed, because if it meowed, I'd be curious as to where the milk came from. Maybe I'm not used to this big city living, but when I shop, I'd rather hear a Muzak version of Gwen Stefani rather than feel like I'm stuck in the middle of some weird psychological experience. I guess by hearing a moo, the consumer's logic is "wait, mooing...cows...FOR THE LOVE OF GOD I NEED MILK!" But thank you Publix, by hearing moos and thunderstorms, you are making me feel like a secure consumer. I know that it's cow milk I'm drinking and vegetables grown in a field.

Posted by Victor on Wednesday, December 28, 2005 at 9:54 PM | Permalink