Kooking With Kang
Unfortunately, my cooking prowess has always been, shall we say, pathetic. It takes true talent to mess up macaroni and cheese. (How you ask? Let's just say that I was unfamiliar with the concept of "straining".) Irregardless (it's a word, look it up if you don't believe me) of said lapse of culinary ability, I decided to try my hand at an exotic dish. This weekend, Papa Kang came calling and we had a fun shopping trip in the ethnic 'hood of Atlanta. Of course, the stereotype of Chinese markets and their "crazy" food was proven quite true. For those who have a weak stomach, perhaps this would be a good time to find nude pictures of your favorite celebrity and stop reading. My little eye did spy in the meat section a delicacy of the lapine variety. That's right, rabbit. The rabbit was essentially in the form of a whole chicken: no head, but it the complete package. You could see its haunches and etc. Now, I've had squirrel once thanks to the cookeration of Grammy Harrison. Let me say that it was delicious. Squirrel gravy and biscuits was a delight. Thus, with a hankering for furry mammals, I decided to try my hand at rabbit. After thawing, I decided to go with 3 options: stew it, fry it and Foreman Grill it. To fry it, I took the...well....arms of the rabbit and breaded it with some Shake n Bake. Result? Well, I burned the fuck out of it so I really didn't taste anything. Now the apartment reeks. For the Foreman, I just cut a few slices off the breast/chestal area (is it called the breast? I don't know. Maybe its the flank.) With a little bit of soy sauce, the meat was pretty tasty. As for the stew part, it's currently in progress. As I type, that wascally wabbit is sitting in a pot with tomato paste, potatoes, carrots and some soy sauce.
*UPDATE* - Well, it's around 11:30 and I tasted the "stew." Amazingly, I did not magically gain the ability of cooking. Maybe I'm not fan of stew in general, but irregardless, it sucked. I think I should just stick with fast food and Hot Pockets. For someone whose biggest culinary feat was BBQing on a grill, this step may have been a bit too optimistic. Now after finding the picture below, I feel guilty for eating such a cute animal. Maybe the rabbit I cooked deserved to be eaten because he was racist or supported Al-Qaeda.
Yes, I am an evil man for eating such a cutie.
per our conversation last night, and after reading this as well, I believe that I have come up with something that will be in tune with your culinary prowess: cereal. preparation can be a bit tricky at first, but you'll get the hang of it. you pour the cereal in a bowl and then add milk to taste. once you master this, you can move on to toast. give me a call this weekend and I'll fill you in on how to boil water.
Posted by
Anonymous |
7:49 AM
I don't know, dude. Have you seen the Hardee's commercials? Toast can be more complicated than we originally thought. Buttering it, whew! Maybe Vic should just stick to Popeye's early morning eye-poppin chicken biscuits. Mmmmmm.... Popeyes. Thanks, Hardee's!
Posted by
Anonymous |
9:50 AM